Ranking Every Wrestling Wedding EVER!
2. Paul Vachon And Ophelia
With this hammy, cheesetastic wedding on an episode of Tuesday Night Titans in Dec. of 1984, you could clearly tell that Vincent J. McMahon was no longer in control of the WWF, and that his sports entertainment loving son had a new vision of what he wanted the wrestling world to look like.
Paul Vachon (step-father of Luna Vachon) was about to get married for the sixth time as Vince McMahon and Lord Alfred Hayes informed us. His blushing bride was the lovely Ophelia. Howard Finkel introduced viewers to the event and told us that it was “one fall with an infinite time limit.” Awwwwww.
There were no fans in attendance, or any family members really; the audience was composed of nothing but wrestlers, and they were exceptionally rambunctious from the start. Jesse Ventura stole some flowers from bridesmaid Diamond Lil, Lou Albano declared that he wanted to marry Fabulous Moolah and George Steele tried to look up the bride’s dress. Throughout the ceremony, the wrestlers in the crowd don’t shut up for a single second, which is kind of funny and kind of annoying at the same time. The nuptials finished off with a pretty hilarious moment of Dr. D running in and bodyslamming the groom for absolutely no reason. He was still invited to the reception.
Dr. D continued being abrasive (almost as much as he was in that John Stossel interview) and slammed some cake in Ophelia's face after lecturing her on how to be a wife. Paul didn’t seem to mind. A food fight between everyone soon broke out, and Vince quickly broke character and couldn’t contain his laughter. For the next five minutes it was complete chaos. At one point, a woman in a mask nearly has her dress ripped off by some of the male wrestlers, so that was kind of disturbing. Vince also found time to dump some 7-Up on Jesse Ventura. It was bats**t strange.
While the skits certainly went long (just the wedding and the reception alone clock in at over 26 minutes), it was a bunch of fun, crazy weirdness that set the tone for all future wrestling weddings to come.