Jones would be higher up this list, except he was only with Chelsea for a single season and most of his reputation was established as one of the 'Crazy Gang' at Wimbledon. A muscular 6'1 midfielder with absolutely no qualms about doing anything to gain an advantage, Jones is perhaps one of the most notorious figures in the history of English football, immortalised by the photo of him giving Paul Gascoigne's nuts a good squeeze while defending a set-piece. He was sent off a staggering 12 times throughout his career and holds the record to this day for the fastest ever booking, somehow managing to scythe down Dane Whitehouse within three seconds of kickoff in a game against Sheffield United. I mean, seriously. Not only did he fully live up to his reputation as a nasty piece of work during his career, at times he actively encouraged it. He was fined a suspended three-month ban from football after presenting a video in 1992 called Soccer's Hard Men, in which he encouraged other players to act in an aggressive and potentially dangerous manner. Later on, he neglected to appear at an FA disciplinary hearing and was subsequently banned indefinitely, though this was reduced to four matches when he argued that he had simply got the date wrong. After being told to grow up by the FA, he later said of his ban that the FA had given him 'a pat on the back' and that he'd 'taken violence off the terraces and onto the pitch'. Needless to say, he's one of the nastiest players to ever turn out in Chelsea blue.
28-year old English writer with a borderline obsessive passion for films, videogames, Chelsea FC, incomprehensible words and indefensible puns. Follow me on Twitter if you like infrequent outbursts of absolute drivel.
