1. Find Whoever Proposed The Giant Slides At St James' Park, And Just Make That Happen
www.thenorthernecho.co.uk Yeah, this was an actual thing for a while. A local business development company submitted plans for a pocket park outside the ground that would also include two giant slides. The City Council took a long hard look at it and decided that, what with the natives track record for misusing things when in the trawls of inebriation (not even joking, I once saw a guy pull the license plate off a parked taxi and use it as a plate for his pizza), they asked for the plans to be resubmitted without the slides. I've no idea what happened next, but if I'd pitched this idea and been asked to make that revision, I wound't have even bothered either, so fair play to them. However, there isn't a single bad idea on the planet that couldn't be made more appealing to the men and women with the decisive rubber stamp with the addition of £75,000 a week. It could even go towards paying for joyless wardens who could politely advise stag parties not to dive down it headfirst, if the safety thing was really an issue. Either way, it's an open goal for the club, because it's absolutely impossible to be disheartened by drawing 0-0 with West Brom when you're leaving the ground by force of gravity alone. Ho'weeeeeeeeeeee The Lads, and such. How do you think Newcastle should spend the money they didn't give Bafetimbi Gomis? Share your thoughts below in the comments.