8 Worst Improvised Moments That Made It To WWE TV

WWE is the most popular and divisive promotion in wrestling: then, now, forever. 

WWE fans love the polish, the bombast, the spectacle. They love the soapy melodrama, often preferring it to the in-ring action - which, to some, is actually the bit that happens before the next plot development, and not the purpose of the plot developments. Leave that stuff to AEW.

WWE critics bemoan how synthetic and produced it can feel. There’s a lack of spontaneity and raucous energy. The super-rigid structure doesn’t allow for it, and WWE appeals to a broad audience. This explains the constant exposition, the repetitive story beats, the notion of dragging things on and on to make sure everybody “gets it”. WWE also needs to make itself feel massive and epic. They have to be seen to be the biggest players. This is perhaps why Michael Cole pretends to lose his mind whenever a figure in a black hooded jacket interferes in the main event of a PLE, as if he’s seen nothing like it before. (It happens every other month). 

There’s more at play. 

WWE can’t position itself as the ultimate dream destination that wrestlers should feel privileged to work for without exerting significant control over its performers. Some wrestlers are afforded freedom on the mic, because they - your CM Punks, John Cenas - have earned it. The rank and file of the WWE roster are told what to say and do because they cannot get ideas above their station. 

On the following evidence, WWE might have a strong argument for the way in which it usually operates. WWE and improvisation pair about as well as Steve Austin and the Undertaker…

Vince McMahon was known, professionally, as a promotional genius. He was, for a time. 

As the 2000s unfolded, he started to lose it. He had the entire wrestling world to capture, given his monopoly, and instead of offering a wide-ranging product with which to do exactly that, he essentially kept doing the Attitude Era, only with fewer needle-moving stars and additional Triple H, and calling it Ruthless Aggression. 

By 2008, he was finished, but there was no big-arena alternative. Some fans liked WWE; others hate-watched it, or kept up out of habit and undying, naive hope. What else were they going to do? 

WWE was your terrible sports team. You hated them, and they hated you back, but you were stuck. 

This was best (?) underscored by the desperation of McMahon’s ‘Million Dollar Mania’ initiative, the basic thrust of which was Vince begging you to tune into Raw under the promise of possibly winning a million big ones. 

Except, nobody was going to win the full milli because that was the maximum prize fund. 

This made for excruciating TV, since Vince could hardly script the calls. Then again, this was 2008; if he was able to do that, it would have been equally awful. Vince entered the stage. He made calls. He failed to dial the correct number three times, was twice Rickrolled, and was disconnected - all across a single segment. 

He did not know how to operate a telephone correctly, much less build new stars. Even Mr. Burns - a parody of an ancient billionaire - eventually learned how to do that!