I told you this would get a little bit outlandish towards the end. But yes, in April of last year, and ahead of their performances at the city's Metro Radio Arena, One Direction were put through their paces at the training ground. Niall Horan, Liam Payne, Harry Styles and Louis Tomlinson, which I think is all of them, spent the day training with the first team. After presumably making Danny Simpson and Dan Gosling look thoroughly pedestrian, they faced off against the playing staff with Styles apparently burying a penalty past goalkeeping coach Andy Woodman. Reports that the rest of them sussed that you have to show Obertan down the outside and Sissoko only runs in straight lines are yet to be confirmed. None of them were picked up by the club, astoundingly, but Tomlinson did later go on to play reserve team football at Doncaster Rovers, before an abortive attempt to buy the club through kickstarter barely registered on the back pages of any paper. He was also absolutely flattened by Gabriel Agbonlahor in a charity match at Celtic Park, which was considerably more entertaining than anything Newcastle United were offering up in the latter stages of the 2012/2013 season. Arguably the biggest missed opportunity on the list then, if you're into that sort of thing. Went on to: Get three UK Number one singles, four BRIT Awards, and sell 45 million records. Not considered as good as: PJ and Duncan, Jimmy Nail, Sting.
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